Money & Communication in Relationships {PODCAST}

Does talking about money cause distress in your relationship?

Communication and relationship coach, Erica Holston of Vine Life Coaching, is our special guest on this episode. She’ll be giving us tips to better talk to our significant others about money without fighting!

Communication in Relationships

Make Time by Slowing Down – We can get so busy with our lives with our careers, kids, sports, family, friends, and oh there is still me time. It can be challenging to balance everything at one time, in a day, a month, or year. Sometimes, we need to stop and breathe, compose ourselves and evaluate when we need to carve out time for our spouses. One thing, you can do with your spouse is agreeing when is a good time to have quality time with each other. It’s so important to let each other know that, “we both matter.” The two of you can do that by giving the other individual attention during the day, week, or month. For example, the two of you can say, “We are going to make time for each other during the work week between 9:00 pm- 9:30 pm.

Keep your relationship top priority by communicating with each other – As easy this may seem, it can be hard for some spouses to talk with each other. It can be for many reasons. Understand that it’s possible to speak with each other, no matter the hurtle. Notice the word, “with” and not “at” each other, there is a difference. When you speak with your spouse, you are listening to what they have to say, being understanding, and giving them your positive feedback. When you speak at someone that means getting your point across from your perspective only and not taking the other person perspective into account. Marriage is about cohesiveness, doing things together, and not apart from each other. We have to put our listening ears on when we are speaking with each other. We can do this by attentively listening to each other, being understanding towards each other, compromising, agreeing, and acting on one accord. Even if you have to pray about your marriage communication. It would be worth it to say, “God help us!”

Make Marriage Relationship Goals – There are always opportunities in every relationship to improve. We just mentioned two goals so far that you can obtain. When I life coach people or have my workshops, I find that some people know what their marriages need. It’s working on them together that is the problem. With some married couples, there are things that are ignored, or they discover there are things stopping them from having a better marriage. When coaching my clients, I let them know that there is still hope to make things better. By working on what’s important to each other. Right now, there may be that one thing, that you are thinking of, for the two of you to work on together. What would that be? Whatever it is, be encouraged to set a goal, make it measurable, make it a priority, and agree collectively this is what we are going to do together.

Make Personal Finance Goals – it possible that one of those goals can be working on is your personal finances. Notice the word, working. To work on something there needs to be a goal, plan, strategy, and effort. Are you pushing your personal finances aside? Thinking about personal finances can make us feel uncomfortable because it might be too much to think about. I will admit when things make me feel uncomfortable, I can let things simmer a little while before I want to work on it. When it comes to personal finances, we should have some type of urgency with an awareness of where we are, what needs to be done, and knowing how we are going to meet our financial goals. Please note that being uncomfortable it’s okay and let’s think about the results you will receive after you work on those goals rather than staying uncomfortable. Let’s carve out some time, look at your finances together, come up with a plan, maybe that’s budgeting, and carry out a plan.

Erica Holsten Relationship Coach, communication in relationships

Erica Holston is a Certified Life Coach Workshop Facilitator, wife of almost six years.  She serves people who want to increase their confidence level, discover their purpose, and become effective communicators. People are receiving lasting change, improved communication skills both personally and professionally. Her clients have greater confidence, fulfilling relationships, and understand how things work for their lifestyle.  Ultimately, Erica wants to see people win, especially in their important relationships!